Unbuilding My Life

There’s this thing that happens when life falls apart.

At first, it feels like failure—like you did something wrong. Like you couldn’t hold it all together when everyone else somehow could. But I’ve been learning that sometimes life doesn’t fall apart… it just falls into place in a way you didn’t expect.

The last few years have been a slow unraveling. I didn’t plan for it. I didn’t really want it. But it happened.

I let go of the business I built. I stepped away from Airbnb and said goodbye to something I poured so much energy into. I sold my van—the one I thought I’d live and travel in for years. And in a lot of ways, it felt like I was losing ground.

But here’s the truth: I wasn’t building a new life. I was unbuilding the old one.

Piece by piece, I’ve been pulling apart all the stuff I used to cling to—the image, the grind, the need to prove myself. The idea that more is better and that freedom only comes when you’ve “made it.”

It’s hard to explain, but something about all of this has felt… honest. Like I’m finally being real with myself. There’s no big plan right now. No perfect blueprint. Just a quiet commitment to choosing what feels true.

And in that space—beneath the striving and the stuff—I’m finding clarity. And with that clarity, something unexpected is happening, my love for photography is growing.

I stopped trying to force it into a business that had to scale or impress anyone. And when I let go of that pressure, it started growing in a way that felt natural. I began saying yes to more Real Estate shoots, and loving it. It’s not about chasing gigs anymore—it’s about believing and accepting what comes into my life.

Even surfing feels different now. It’s become more soulful—less about the performance or the rush, and more about connection. With the ocean. With myself. With the moment. As I let go of trying to “be” someone out there, I’ve found a deeper rhythm in the water, one that mirrors the shift happening in my life.

I don’t have everything figured out. I still get anxious. I still question things. But I’m learning to let that be part of the process.

I don’t need to fill the empty space so quickly anymore. I’m learning to sit in it. To breathe in it. To trust that the life I’m meant to live might not be something I build… It might be something I find, slowly, as I let go of everything that isn’t real.

So yeah… I guess I’m unbuilding my life. And somehow, in the mess of it all, I’m finally starting to feel like myself again.

If this post resonates with you, feel free to share it—or drop a comment below. I’d love to hear your story, too. Thank you for taking the time to read this post.